I could have met an officer who took what I had to say seriously. Going to the police as a sex worker is like a game of roulette. Even if I had decided to go at that point, what would I have said? It was only a few days later when what happened began to truly sink in. I even filmed the last scene we had planned together.Īt the end of the shoot, I took my money, left his house, sent him a message saying that I’d no longer feel comfortable working with him again, and blocked him. I pushed it to the back of my mind and tried to do what I could to get on with my day. Some people who’ve experienced sexual violence talk about going into a survival mode, and that’s exactly what I did.Īfter he had finished and untied me, I compartmentalised what had happened. Sadly, due to common misconceptions of the porn industry – that it’s violent, exploitative, that I’m willingly putting myself in danger – some people might even say that I deserved it. I had no reason to expect that the boundaries I’d set with him previously wouldn’t be respected, and yet, with the cameras rolling, they seemed to have vanished. We’d filmed a scene earlier that day, and it had gone well. I’d worked with this producer twice before, and had been happy each time. It was at this point that he leaned in to me and said, ‘I can do whatever I want to you, and you cannot stop me.’ I was bare, blindfolded, bound and gagged in his studio.
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